in kenya, male turkeys HATE women. I'm being serious here, they constantly chase and harass us. I've been chased by them, my sister, aunts and mother too.saw one chase my grandmother around our back yard when she was on her crutches, it was a tiny bit hilarious for us but terrifying for her. anyway, these birds make…

I've never encountered chickens without being harassed by a rooster. I associate chickens only with glancing nervously over my shoulder to make sure no murder birds are stealthily stalking me with their horrible dead eyes.

This brought back sweet memories. Several years ago and two houses ago, my family had several chickens, including two who recognized my car. When I'd pull in the driveway after work, the two of them would come RUNNING to the garage, wait rather impatiently for me to get out of my car, then squat down and cluck…

Our most dominent chicken was the snuggliest. She would hop right in my lap and take a nap. I assumed she felt I was the boss chicken, so when I was around she could relax. Happy chickens make such sweet little purrs, trills, and coos.

That's because you have 1997 in your handle. It's okay tho. I'm sure you have a bunch of things about pop-culture I don't get as well.

For months she would say to people "chicken bite me. Mommy bite chicken!"

I'm sorry but that is not cute! Chickens are scary and I want nothing to do with them other than eating their delicious plucked bodies and unfertilized eggs.

I would not be able to sleep in the same city as that cat.

It's all fun and games until it embraces it's inner velociraptor and starts chasing you down the street.

after a run-in with a wild chicken at the age of 10, I trust not a single one. A chicken could bring me cocoa and butter cookies and I still wouldn't be a fan. They are always plotting something, believe that.

I have a cat named Chicken. She purrs sometimes. That's basically the same, right?

Did you know that goats scream?

Rewatched and heard the poo splat noise. Gross.

Frank Costanza: Let me understand, you got the hen, the chicken and the rooster. The rooster goes with the chicken. So, who's having sex with the hen?

Sweet birdie. Until he poops on the lady (or so it sounds.)

Surely if the internet bands together we can find her and celebrate her for the goddamn hero she is.

Oh here it is. Thanks, internet!