Nah. It makes me think of “Winnie the Pooh.” Oh, bother.

The funny thing is that not one person that has ever used the “I pay your salary” line is looking for “quality” service, they are ALWAYS looking for “special snowflake” service.

Oooh, you’re one of those gross people.

You are wrong, and FERPA says you are wrong. I had to tell a few helicopter parents that they had no right to any of their child’s information when I worked at a University. They would bitch and moan about how they are paying for their child’s education, so they have riiiiiights.

This is the best one!

I saw a bunch of boring clones.

University of Phoenix.

I just want to hug you forever.

I didn’t cry at my husband’s funeral. I didn’t cry publicly at all, in fact. Not even at the hospital when I saw that he had shot most of his face off. I cried privately. Inside myself I was a wreck, in severe physical/psychic pain from the loss.

an orchestra of barf noises

“Fuzzy Berries” is much better! Maybe one called “bananarama” would fit the theme better?

Did my grandma name this restaurant? She’s the only person I have ever heard use the term “tallywhackers.” And yes, she is a Texan.

Well, now we know there was a baby that is definitely smarter than the royal baby!

and google will never let you forget!!!

Sorry, totally read you wrong!

Same here. Loooove giving blowjobs, but I have no interest in being eaten out (and I never have). I gave it a whirl plenty of times, but it just wasn't my thing. If I were to start dating again and meet a new guy today, I'd bet you a million bucks he would say, "You just haven't had it done right." Sigh.

Meh, rodent poops are little pellets. I call them Dustbuster-friendly doo-doos.

Ahahaha! Yes!

I always think of a trunk/box that gets sent around the world, like in a cartoon.