And the scene following the birthday cake incident sees Rhousey beating the ever-loving shit out of Wahlberg for a good twenty minutes, right?

You’ve just made me imagine the Mission: Impossible series starring Penelope Cruz. It’s a mind-blowing concept.

I feel so conflicted about I Heart Huckabees because so many people involved - Russell, Hoffmann, Wahlberg - are either suspected of being awful or it’s pretty well confirmed, but damn if it isn’t one great performance after another, including Markie Mark. (Plus, it has Isabelle Huppert. *dreamy sigh*)

Cruz? Tom Cruz? Tom Cruise’s non-union Mexican equivalent?

You just summed up most people’s feelings about the war(s) in Iraq.

Marky Mark was flirting with the a-list too, now he’s flirting with straight to video. They can go together.

he’s great when he’s great (boogie nights, i <3 huckabees, three kings, the other guys, even way back to basketball diaries), but his ‘movie star’ movies are mostly trash.

So Mark Walhberg recently bought a Chevy dealership here in Columbus, Ohio and is offering to buy our soccer team so it doesn’t move to Austin, Texas.  Also he’s a hate crime committing piece of shit and I hope this movie gets crushed by Crazy Rich Asians. 

30 years later I am still baffled by this guy’s career. A short,average looking male model/shitty boy band rapper becomes a movie star despite lacking both charisma and ability. Who took those fucking CK photos? Herb Ritts? We should dig up that fucker so we can kill him again for giving this idiot a career.

Beyond a retrospective framing device that allows Wahlberg to whisper nuggets of realpolitik wisdom (“You think you know the definition of collusion? You have no idea”)

“It allows Wahlberg to play pretend as a big-boy American hero, while also providing Berg another opportunity to fawn over the virtues (and hardware) of U.S. men of action.”

You know, for a minute there, like, a decade ago, Berg looked like he was on track to become a really interesting A-list director. Then Battleship happened. Now, he’s just Marky Mark’s Dennis Dugan.

Somebody please cast Lauren Cohan and Iko Uwais in better films, but especially Uwais. 

I don’t mind it. It’s a bit amateurish, but he’s an amateur.

This is from her origin story when she was exposed to the gamma radiation that caused her to become The Great Aretha Franklin!

Well... I mean... It’s the thought that counts, right?

On one hand, her death has devastated her family and saddened millions, but on the other at least it gave you the opportunity to whine about her being rude.

If there was a ‘Mount Rushmore’ of best popular music singers, Aretha’s face would have to be the first face on the monument. 

Fun fact: Aretha, Madonna, Marvin Gaye, and Taylor Swift are the only artists to have a song peak at each position from #1 thru #10 on the Billboard Hot 100.

She’s honestly one of the better actors in Blues Brothers, too.