The two little knuckleheads I nanny are in 2nd and 4th grade, and it definitely can be like pulling teeth to find out about their day. I try to ask nutty questions to spark their interest. “Jess, what is the weirdest thing someone said in class today?” or “Who did the funniest thing at lunch?”. They may seem like…

I grew up in Ft Lauderdale, and then moved to Memphis, Atlanta, DC, NYC. Clearly RH needs to head to Memphis or Ft Lauderdale.

This is so nice to hear. Everything I read online per vets was saying it would take weeks to socialize the girls, but my place is small and I’m not willing to have food/litter boxes all over my one bedroom. They get along great now. They spar and chase but it’s all normal kitty stuff - they also curl up together on…

I read this as “Jackée’s mom” and it honestly made sense for a few seconds when I saw that hat. Now I am sad.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders is one of those women where you can get lunch with her, or girls cocktails and she is totally fine until she tells you “wait, you let your 1 year old boy and 3 year old girl bathe together? You know what he’s thinking. That’s just not right”.

One of the first sad/jokey/real things I did post election was to call my best friend and tell him “So, we’re going to take the kids to the lake and just drown them, right?”

Can someone please off me some kitten advice. I adopted a 4 week old in May, and I decided to get her a sister so they could exercise one another and keep company. Both are rescues. They’re both now about 4 months (one kitty is spayed and the other is on the way) and they’re both female indoor only cats. My question…

I was the nanny for the comptroller for Equifax for three years. I recall her telling me they house credit info in unmarked buildings around Atlanta, not in the proper Equifax on Peachtree. This is because of near constant bomb threats sent into the executive building... You don’t say?

Am I losing my mind here? Every white person is racist? This is OK now to make blanket statements about millions of people and expect zero blow back? If this is the hill she expected to die on and make a name for herself with, super. But for those of us that are not try-hard but actually trying, go fuck yourself.

I have a severe sensitivity to the sound of crackling bags and people gnoshing in an otherwise quiet movie. I barely see a movie a year now. God Jesus why nachos? And this was before cell phones. I took my kids to IMAX right before the eclipse at our local museum expecting a reprieve from food related noise, but sure…

I’m getting way more James Brown that I am Jackie with the wig. North looks precious as hell.

Fuck CK. Don’t Cosby us. Cosby already Cosbied the fuck out of being a massively beloved and popular turned rapey-comedian. But jeez man, watching Tig’s show is like having to sit through community theater. It drags and it’s poorly acted and at best funny-adjacent. Tig is wasted here. I can’t believe it’s been…

Thank you for reminding me of this.

Did anyone else hear NPR report this story last week? It had a weird “isn’t this delicious!” tone to it throughout with the two journalists comparing the murder to a Hollywood mystery/thriller. That poor journalist died, sheesh, try for a little more solemnity.

I’ve managed to convince the 9 and 7 yearolds that I nanny for that CEC is the pit of hell. It’s dirty, the prizes suck, it’s all rigged, the pizza is nasty, and the kids always go home glum because after I lay down 20 for each kiddo they somehow only make it out with a prize of as sucker or a spider ring. And worst…

I have this super vivid memory of being at a birthday party in the early 80's (I’m 36) watching a bunch of bears on stage miming along to “Listen To the Music”. Was that Showbiz?

I will never forgive Heidi Klum and whatever fucking yogurt company that cast her years ago for a yogurt commercial - she is in a grocery store in the dairy aisle where she SLURPS down a fucking yogurt cup and licks the lid. Fine, I hate the sexual yogurt imagery but I was moreso pissed about the horrible liquid…

A friend and I tried the baby food/hard liquor concoction Truman Capote favored after we saw Capote for a story I was writing. I’d always assumed baby food tasted like yogurt etc. It was bland as fuck, only made worse by mixing it with vodka. No wonder babies make those faces when you tunnel that mess into their…

Oh God, the feels, THE FEELS. Thank you angel stylist from heaven. It’s a nasty cycle that feeds itself. You’re too depressed/low on energy to self care. And the worse your appearance gets the more depressed you get. I have an expert stylist in the family that I see for free and it took me 6 months to get my butt back…

Both of my kids have some pretty intense ADHD and when I issue an instruction like “Jane, it’s time to get off the iPad and hop in the shower. Don’t forget to put your dirty clothes in the hamper. Okay?” I am mainly saying it to make sure she HEARD ME even. Anytime there is media, or a pet, or toys around she goes…