Heh heh heh... *vomits into lap*... Heh heh heh...

Brewkake

My daughter died in 2011 when she was five from a malignant brain tumor.

This is Adequate Man, not I Spent $500 On Snow Tires And Probably Also Didn't Use Underwear As A Washcloth This Morning Man.

This is as awesome as that video that shows how to completely peel a clove of garlic in 10 seconds by shaking it around inside two metal bowls.

Have you read Foodspin, a Deadspin sub-blog? He's an excellent cook and A+ food writer.

Dear Albert Burneko, I don't know who you are, but you have now written two of my favorite pieces in the history of ever (this and "The American Justice System is Not Broken"). I just want to thank you for existing.

Humanity has spent five thousand years gathering the collective knowledge to get us this far only to say "Fuck those people, I am gonna listen to Jenny McCarthy and Glenn Beck".

Man I've never wanted to inject someone with smallpox SO MUCH.

A still-frame close-up of his face is exactly what we need. A screen-Grabner, if you will.

Look, if I want to hear from a governor who is serious about doughnuts, it's going to be New Jersey.

Exactly, he is qualified to talk about this then because he isnt a moron.

Most of the world calls it "climate change" now because derps like you can't grasp the fact that "global warming" =/= "every day is hot forever".

The rest of the enlightened world does as well. The only people that don't believe in it, are, well, in fact glue-huffing apes.

I think he is saying it looks just as bad as a Wes Anderson movie.

So it just looks like a Wes Anderson movie.

Lets not forget how he bravely defended the Superdome against Al Qaeda.

that's connecticut