The only options are choice number two, and being wrong.

My grandmother would have been completely out of her element serving a restaurant dinner from a professional kitchen. I valued her opinions on food over that of anyone.

Especially Nixon.

I like this more.

This the similar logic that if your wedding photographer loses or damages your pictures, they only owe you the value of the rolls of film (yes, I realize this is somewhat out of date.)

I want to start a service similar to what the Fairfax County's CEU has.

I predict a future moment where he is crying in a government office because of his own terrible choices.

I hope he got his 40 quarters on the books. Otherwise he isn't collecting social security.

Don't forget to throw rotten cabbages at them.

The car needs a Bike rack with this mounted.

Not necessarily. I had a less severe, but head-on accident. Nothing was broken, but my knees hit the dash despite my seatbelt. You'll be amazed how much a belt stretches and how much you will bend around them.

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Sorry, no such thing as a funny rape joke.

Agreed. I suspect he'll struggle to find the joke (meanwhile, I'll need hernia surgery from all my laughing.)

Send him to jail. It'll be funny*

Every time I see the name Taylor Kinney, my mind goes to Kerri Kenney. I prefer my alternate universe where Lady GaGa marries Deputy Trudy Wiegel.

Members of the academy are entitled and encouraged to be upset about how their dog and pony show disrespected Elaine Stritch.

I would argue that, instead of being angry about this, we recognise that this is a good reason to stop giving a shit about the Academy Awards.

I have no idea about the comics. The tv story is moving slower than reality. Five years ago Chandler Rigg was a ten year old playing a ten year old. Now he is a 15 playing a twelve year old.

Yeah, I think you're decribing something different. You don't eat like a picky six year old.