I never knew the m in m-dash stood for Mushnick. Damn, dude...mix in a parenthesis or something.

I get that Toradol is harmful in the long run.

After more than thirty years, this motherfucker still gives me goose bumps.

Incidentally, “Trainyard Hobo” would be a great name for a band.

It’s a disgrace. We’re long overdue for this pathetic team to be liquidated so that I never have to hear from them or their stupid Duval County fans with their inferiority complexes ever again.

Carrie Fisher is the absolute best. Gary is ugly as fuck but I would so adopt Carrie.

More like Madeleine Davies, amirite?

Pizza crust is my dog’s spirit animal.

“I’m aware this take means I can never be a southerner and that pleases me.”

I hear you and wasn’t intending to sound dismissive. I would imagine that would be difficult.

Thanks for the clarification.

Which part is the cooter?

Humblebrag award of the day.

Why in effigy?

I’ve been to Kansas.

Ironic that Trump’s comments about grabbing women “by the p*ssy” has resulted in Hillary now having him by the balls.

This will be the thing that keeps Donald from getting the African-American vote.

This list is — not unexpectedly — utter bullshit.

I am a veteran who served twenty years, including nine in Special Operations.

Learning Moment™: