OH HELL NO!

Sacrificial Republican? LOL Meghan, no one would dare sacrifice you. For one, the budget to clean up all the frosting which would ooze out of your bloated mass would be insurmountable.

DM to Chris Pratt: OF COURSE they’re super-nice to you. You’re a rich star. It’s like the Tom Cruise relationship with Scientology... they’re never going to lock him in the bowels of a decrepit boat and make him a slave.

The animated character was perfectly designed. In fact, why didn’t they just go the same route? Did Will personally request he be depicted as “buff” or something? He’s a GENIE. Pretty sure a vigorous training regime isn’t a priority when you’re TRAPPED IN A FREAKING BOTTLE.

I have been known to make my own kombucha vinegar hot sauce. :)

But in a pinch? Just a dash of Red Rooster does it for me every time.

I have been known to make my own kombucha vinegar hot sauce. :)

But in a pinch? Just a dash of Red Rooster does it…

I guess some people don’t get my sense of humor. That was damn funny. And honestly, absolutely no one else thought of using it as an expression. 

Ding-dong?! HOW DARE YOU SIR!

Honestly, I don’t know how to write it any more clearly; Dane Cook is an unfunny hack.

I’m an asshole now because I don’t like Dane Cook’s joke?

It’s not meaningless. It really boils down to the fact that I think he’s an overrated douche.

Silly-ass literal interpretation? Please.

You’re going to expense a DONUT? Fucking cheapo.

There’s a massive failure to communicate here. Let’s start with what the definition of a joke is:

joke - something said or done to provoke laughter or cause amusement, as a witticism, a short and amusing anecdote, or a prankish act

How was it funny?

That’s a joke?

regarding “I’m not the Lord...”

I challenge you to recite one funny Dane Cook joke from memory. Just one.

They really painted themselves into a corner by having aged Indiana Jones show up in the TV show. In the first three films he was always teetering between surviving or having his ass completely and utterly destroyed. That’s the sequel I want; the longtime adventurer whose luck just plain runs out. He still wins, but…

Hyperbole? You, you f*cking retard, typed what?

I am sick to death of Nazi wannabe killers and would like to publicly encourage them to just take themselves out like their hero Hitler did. Follow your leader, you wastes of space. You serve no useful purpose.

The softcore-porn whore who is currently pretending she’s a First Lady (and not a gold digging fraud whose crooked husband only has the job because of a dilapidated Electoral College) lied on her visa, lied FOR YEARS about having a degree she never obtained, lied about writing a speech she didn’t write, and supporter…

Sanders is deplorable. A complete waste of the vast amount of skin she has amassed.