PLEASE BE QUIET! SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO MASTURBATE!

I miss the old DS, man.

Goddammit you're like the den mother of this post. Go watch Pulp Fiction. Jeez.

Slow clap! Well done!

Hey! Nobody's making a big deal about the guy making fun of Irish potato farmers.

My name is Paul, and this shit's between y'all.

Zach Price had a pretty bad Thursday.

Yup, just like Muhammad Ali.

first-degree criminal mischief.

Ekpe U'doh!

Of course he can afford it. He can sell his properties on Baltic and Mediterranean.

Every woman within 400 meters was impregnated.

+1 for trying to sneak in the 'please bargain' post and no one would catch it.

Mahzel tov, bitch!

DeAndre concurs.

Katherine: WE'RE ENGAGEDDD!!!

Thats how we used to do it in the old Deadspin days!

He used to spell it Dominick, but well, y'know.

@DerrickWard32

Just wait to see how surprised he is when Aaron slips into his room later tonight.