PRIEST MODE

If he isn't drafted, chalk it up to the NFL's non-prophet status.

"Harbaugh looked like a drop of vinegar in the midst of oil."

OSCAR WATCH 2014

They've been allowing black people for quite a while now.

Usually, the only time you see the Millionaires and the Senators get together is at Republican Congressional Committee fundraisers.

You know, people like to poke fun at Whitlock and call him lazy but he squats over 350 pounds every day . . . more than once if he ate Tex-Mex.

This is a new security feature on Twitter in which any account that follows Skip Bayless is automatically considered to be compromised.

"Minus-five, with chances of a weak Flurry"

FICO also has a ceremony planned in which they'll retire Iverson's credit score and raise his 300 to the rafters.

"How about not saying 'Modell'?"

He won't be the first person forced to go with Plan B right after getting fucked.

Probably a combination of things.

"God told him to stay at the airport and don't do anything, just stay there."

Our prospect who art in Gate 7,
fallowed be thy brain
Thy pro day come, thy will be done
As a legitimate NFL draft pick

Go figure the Undertaker was a ginger.

Baseball is here! I can even see the hotdogs!

1,695 words before Will gets to the only one you need:

Look, just because Marchman did it, we don't need every writer posting their awful breakfast rankings.

I have to stick up for my boy Vertonghen here. I know it looks like it was soft, but how do you know it didn't legitimately hurt him? Even the slightest bump to your head stings a hell of a lot more than you'd think.