How the hell is Embiid listed at less than 7 feet? Here he is next to Siakam:

Somewhat true, but the A’s are currently paying a large amount in what basically amounts to dead money ($33 million on both Homer Bailey and Matt Harvey!). They probably use that to resign their Matts once that money comes off the books, but the A’s are in a much better monetary situation than the Rays.

It more has to do with the fact that they shed salary to even get to this point. Mind you, that involved getting out of Chris Archer’s maddening ride for two top-prospects*. And then signing Charlie Morton to fill that hole.

His spleen suffered a setback after trying to fight a reflection of itself in the mirror.

This robot funded by Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir, so they can just go fuck somewhere other than on the ice.

That’s going to be their new password. Extra GUMBO makes it more secure.

Bianca will slot in above the basket guy, but just below the “I smell burnt toast” woman.

Stefan appearing on Deadspin only a week after a list of the worst foods to vomit up cannot be a coincidence!

Pfft, we all know they’ll trade Matt Chapman to the Blue Jays in 2021 for Sean Reid-Foley and some random 19 year old.

everybody is putting on a happy face as they travel to Winnipeg

And due to Canadian language laws, the changes would have to be announced in French as well.

They picked the wrong Matt. Matt Olson would have been an amazing home run derby contestant. Not as good as Yelich, mind you.

Once you start, you Kanata stop!

The Leafs, though, desperately need and are going to adore Barrie.

As punishment you are sentenced to several more months of playing for the Mets.

Roses are red
I got home plate seats
Tickets in the gift basket
For making Derek scream “Yeah Jeets”

Yeah, I think the weight weenieness of some riders is a pain in the ass. As a former mechanic though, I get excited about bike parts. Any parts, though! I just want to play with bikes, really.

It gets better. The Blue Jays get to go to Coors for an interleague series!

The reason for two Canadian ESPNs is easy: telecoms want broadcast rights! (TSN = Bell, Sportsnet = Rogers)