Hey sis!

I’m going to start saving up money so I can flee the country before the bombing happens. Any suggestions for a country that I should stay relatively safe in?

... and North Korea will bomb us in 2018, so no sense worrying about healthcare. Nice knowing y’all!

Trump’s the kind of king that would expect his serfs to throw themselves into a volcano’s mouth to appease the gods, and then criticize their form as they die in agony because the volcano is still erupting.

Congress has me looking into emigration. I’m glad I’m a skilled worker and countries with single payer will take me on even with pre-existing conditions. I can’t afford to live in the US....

Sanders has a decades-long habit of making shitty votes based on shitty reasoning that is subject to change if he can come up with a better spin for his shitty, shitty votes. And somehow gullible fools excuse his shitty votes over and over.

Well, since they’re taking away our health care, a lot of us won’t have to worry about what happens in 2018.

I hate that I’m about to defend Jeff Secessions, but here it is: Recusal wasn’t even disloyal to trump. It was simply something he was obligated to do. It’s virtually the only thing that Secessions has done right since becoming AG, and that’s going to be his undoing. Hilarious.

He’s acting like it makes no sense that people are questioning his family members. Dude, you filled your office with family members! You have Jared doing 300 different things and he works in the WH. They aren’t just talking to him for shits and giggles.

I’m assuming he was banished from whatever magical kingdom they live in for being a racist piece of shit. You don’t want that kind of attitude affecting cookie production.

Why the fuck would he bring his own son into this even as a “joke”? Barron is a child and supposed to be off-limits, right? Maybe keep your kid’s name out of such serious accusations, you fuckin twat.

Can we have planet where cranky old white dudes don’t run everything? Asking for a friend...

Really unfair to actual Keebler elves who, among other things, ensure I have delicious Grasshopper cookies to snack on.

Careful to not give Collins too much credit. She’s just as craven as the rest of them. She pushes back against the republican agenda when it’s politically possible, but never when it matters. She’s just as bad as McCain.

...Is he saying Barron colluded with the Russians? Did anyone NOT collude with the Russians!?

Question though. How much would we all laugh if it turned out Barron was the mysterious source leaking everything from the WH.

I guess the tree where he and the rest of the elves make cookies doesn’t count as a sanctuary city.

John McCain lost his last chance to actually be a maverick rather than simply call himself one. He might have secured his name for the ages had he stood up to the bully and said ‘no.’

I live in NYC and am a woman in my late 40s. I don’t believe I’ve met a lovely single man (not counting the gay ones) in over a decade so I guess I just skated over that part ;-).

I strongly believe that a lot of people get married (and have kids) because that’s “what you do.”