Also, if there is someone who HAS to die in Mulan:

But then who plays Mushu? He’s the real star of the whole damn film anyway.

JEZEBEL NOTICED MY PETITION.

Mark Schrayber is the only white Mulan I would accept.

Sometimes I imagine that every time shade is misused, a drag queen forgets how to contour.

Thank you. As a loyal reader from early in the book series (yes, in the 90s) I'm upset because I have no choice. I have to watch the show. It's going to be impossible to not watch the show, live a normal life, and not get spoiled. It's not what I hoped for when I started reading. I loved reading the books and not…

"I find that question pretty offensive, people speculating about my death and my health," he said, in an interview with the Swiss newspaper Tagesanzeiger, "So fuck you to those people."

ALSO FIVE FUCKING MILLION DOLLARS IS PEANUTS COMPARED TO THE DEFENSE AND OVERALL BUDGET! Fuck off forever, whoever voted against this bill.

*presses play*

I guess you could say they...man-eloped.

Seemed appropriate:

One does not need to be a hobbit fan to know what it feels like to be a hobbit.

My god, you’re so right.

me & u rn

I...have some news about Liberace.

why didnt you people tell me

Bobby Flay changed the recipe for his marriage to something more...deconstructed

was Barry Manilow being gay a thing that everybody knew about and I was just in the dark?

Fuck. I had a meeting and couldn’t get in to say that she will be played by Scarlett Johanson.