This movie will probably be a disaster, but dare I say that this featurette made me a little excited?

*Bookmarks page to come back for the people shrieking about the Female Gaze later today.*

You tell really weird jokes

Except some cease and desists are valid and should be followed.

#JusticeForPeyton'sForehead

I wouldn't use "handsome" to describe either Manning. A more accurate statement would be "Peyton is once again passed up for his slightly-less-foreheady brother."

He does make the best sad/disappointed faces, though.Once it's clear they'll be losing the game, I just watch his faces.

Being beat is not fun: trust me, I would know.

I'm going to be the nearly-40-year-old childless woman sitting alone in the movie theater crying tears of joy and sentimentality throughout this whole movie. If you see me, do not be alarmed. I'm not actually insane and I won't hurt you or your children. Just leave me be with my memories, tears, and tissues.

I hope people are still caring for you. Forever.

You mean there's flattering and there's Kardashian.

OK, coconut water mixed with pineapple juice sounds like a goddamned horror show.

I should've added "we're not including soups that appear to be made out of grease stock."

It's difficult to type this because a fist just formed to punch someone over "Instalady". #bitterhag

Mispandry!

Pandas that want privacy shouldn't do this in front of a camera. Slutty pandas deserves what they get. They are all attention whores anyway.*

In related news...

Beats, shoots and leaves.

Oh NO you guys, I *live* in Dallas. I should get like, 42 days of paid leave.