Don’t worry; they plan on coming out with a new cult with a much easier method of interaction with the public, based on selling the women they have collected. It’ll be called “Vendo in Nomine Domini Obsequiosum Vestrum Sororium”.

I agree with pretty much everything you said. I will take exception to one. I was adopted. My parents are my parents. But again, as you said? We’re supposed to buy a teenage virgin knocked up by the holy ghost and some guy of indiscriminate age as her partner. In my factual world, even if Joseph was an old codger that…

My family and I just landed in Tokyo yesterday for some family business. When we cleared customs and stepped into the main terminal we were greeted by a gigantic monitor running a news program that showed a larger-than-life image of Trump (he left right before we got here). My dear, sweet 10-year-old daughter sighed…

I will never disregard the idea of “Prayer Works” from an individual standpoint. If Faith and Prayer make your life feel more fulfilling, gives it more meaning, or helps you navigate through personal difficulties, by all means pray, pray until your hearts content.

Yup. I spent three months doing training schedule for the Marine Corps marathon, only to have my class of kindergarteners bless me with nearly every transmittable disease known to humankind the day before the race. Kids are so precious.

I’m 2.5 weeks out from a half that I’ve been training through the humidity for and I’ve got a damn bone contusion that I’m trying to heal. The things we do...

They start unbanning things.

the summer before my sophomore year in college i was training super hard, thinking of transferring into a rinky-dink cross country program. it wouldn’t have paid for school but i was lucky to be offered in the first place. the night before the half marathon i had pegged as my mid-summer peak, i stepped off my best…

Jesus, Torchy. Your imaginary foreign vehicles are slipping through some kind of wormhole.

A bit of column ‘a’ and a bit of column ‘b’. The small teams don’t get enough revenue to operate without massive losses and they can’t afford the development costs necessary to compete with the big teams and earn a larger share of revenues, which would allow them to develop a more competitive car. It’s a vicious cycle…

Polka, especially Chicago, style polka is underrated. Polka along with its non-union Mexican equivalent, Conjunto, might not be the best music but it may be the most fun. It goofy and easy to dance and best of all its not cool. Nothing sucks the fun out of something like the cool kids, fuck them. This has been my…

It’s especially weird because doing one thing doesn’t stop you from doing the other. Even if a miner learns to be a plumber or computer programmer he can still work in a mine if one reopens. Education gives you more, not less, freedom.

The idea of “merit based immigration” is also funny coming from the “they’re taking our jobs!” crowd. Like, sure, you can give visas to people who have computer engineering degrees- but there are already Americans who have those degrees and want to work in that field. There aren’t tons of Americans who want to spend…

But in actuality, it’s an acronym for “The Cucks Undermining Trump Can’t Understand The Crazy Useless Taxes Act.”

The Cornerstone Speech delivered by Confederate Vice President Alexander Stephens at the Athenaeum in Savannah, Georgia, on March 21, 1861, a few weeks before the Confederacy would start the American Civil War. Essentially, it was the Confederacy’s declaration of war.

Using your kid for a stupid political stunt is cool.

“Because you don’t like history doesn’t mean that you can erase it and pretend it didn’t happen”