(I never got along with the Paisley I knew in high school. So no.)

Team Archie Panjabi.

And the floods in 2013 in the UK were caused by the gayers. So the drought in California is obviously the fault of lesbians.

No water in CA? Blame Ellen, the bitch!

The energy-saving bulbs isn’t specifically the French - all of the EU can no longer use incandescent bulbs. Also, I’m pretty sure that the wind turbines aren’t being run inside the warehouses with the bulbs and thus don’t increase the danger.

Asks for FUCKING DIRECTIONS WHEN OBVIOUSLY LOST.

these low-rise jeans demand confidence, strategy—and let’s be honest, some crunches

I’ve watched that show several times through and it is downright creepy when reality follows minor plot lines...

I always lol at the Okcupid question “Do you remember the names of everyone you’ve ever made out with?” I’m tempted to comment “Not unless ‘Four Different Guys at the 2008 New Years’ Party” is a name.

You guys could be us. We’re not married but have been together 20 years.

10+ points for your The Talented Mr. Ripley reference

I'm rooting for Sansa to snap and rally her friends in the north, going on a murderous rampage killing all the Boltons. Doesn't seem likely but that's what I want.

because we need an excuse to be angry in the morning or else what are we even here for

There goes that patriarchy, patriarchin’ again.

there’s just. i just. i don’t. whut.

Sometimes you just have to vote against evil.

i mean he might say no but like

Shia LaBeouf is that friend who posts emo statuses on FB but when you ask whats wrong they say “I dont want to talk about it on Facebook”

The Evangelicrazies don’t give a rats ass about Jewish people. They just want to be sure when the Rapture happens, they’re in Israel ready to be allowed on the Holy Spaceship to Heaven.

WHY IS AMERICAN MONEY ALL THE SAME COLOUR AND SIZE? HOW MUCH DO I HAVE IN MY WALLET? THIS IS SILLY. Signed, confused tourist

As a white man, I vote no, because any recognition that people who don’t look like me get means that I am diminished somehow. I’m not sure how, but it totally means that.