It must be really exhausting to write for The Onion right now.

I used to think that weight was between a person and their doctor. Then I had sciatica about 10 years ago. My first neurology appointment the doctor shamed me for 45 minutes about how my weight was causing my sciatica. Fast forward 9 years and 50# lighter.... I still fucking have that sciatica and wish I could scream…

Of course she has! And she was great at it!

See, people? If you don’t vote, conservatives win and we don’t get Robyn’s music. If that’s not enough to motivate you, I don’t know what is. 

All this money and they both go outside looking like *that*.

The mom in me wants to take a washcloth to Bieber’s face. Young man looks like he’s overdue a good scrubbing.

For many years I washed floors and cleaned bathrooms at night in addition to having a “real” job during the day in academia. It sucked, but it was honest work that paid the bills. I get where she is going in saying that these horrid people should have a fall from grace and learn to empathize with real people, but she…

When the conversation turned to Kavanaugh, Chua told the students that it was “no accident” that Kavanaugh’s clerks “looked like models.” One of the students pointed out that Chua’s own daughter was one of Kavanaugh’s clerks, and she responded that her daughter wouldn’t tolerate inappropriate behavior

SIDEBAR: I had briefly forgotten that “tiger mom” bullshit exists. Ugh.

Bizarre and sad is right. If you read the court papers, which appear to be written in her handwriting, she basically blames Bey for everything that’s gone wrong in her life from lost or stolen items to relationship breakups to pet deaths.

I KNEW it!

Ugh, Jason Chaffetz. How is he not working at a shady used car lot that offers E-Z CREDIT FINANCING? 

Also, Clarence Thomas was the one that sexually harassed Anita Hill, which resulted in her being dragged and defamed during Thomas’s confirmation hearings, just like what is happening here. You’ve heard the name Anita Hill, right?

Yeah, there’s no way I’m listening to Trump any more than is necessary.

Uh.. Clarence Thomas was nominated by George Bush almost 27 years ago. You might want to learn some stuff about the subjects you comment on?

Go home capitalism, you're drunk.

I’m entirely open to seeing new stories set in the Star Wars Universe, no matter what era they’re set in.

I’m less enthused about the prospect that every single one of those stories involving an established character I already know and love, because it both cheapens them and makes this entire, expansive world feel that…

Hyperbole drive....ENGAGE!!!

Friendly reminder that the AV Club comments section is now a dumpster fire.

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