Chapped everything - dust gets inside everything and there is no amount of lube that will fix it.

Computer - erase that entire personal log.

How about “grounded with jumper cables clamped to his testicles”?

Don’t listen to Macy Grey. Her singing voice is the feminine equivalent to Rod Stewart.

Burn retnias out with laser pointer. How ever long it takes.

I read “beer flavored Pop tart” and thought “considering the low quality of the ‘fruit’ filling would they just use dried urine as a beer flavor?”

So Dan Fielding?

Upon hearing that one of these ladies is from Texas I expect there is a LOT of feminine Texas pride and older Texan women smiling at each other and nodding knowingly.

Ohhhh. Embarrassing stories.

The shells sell it too

I moved all over the US growing up so I got very good at quickly adapting my accent, dialect and vocabulary.

Wreckless is your assumption that Yoda is not the wife, hmmm?

Came to post this exact image.

I’m a bit serious about bread and pizza so I got a pizza stone... from a cooking store. I was unimpressed by its repeat performance. Also my big oven still varied a lot in temperature and internal physical locations.

I’m a bit serious about bread and pizza so I got a pizza stone... from a cooking store. I was unimpressed by its…

Before getting my Breville I had one of these Panasonic halogen-superbright radiation toaster ovens.

Before getting my Breville I had one of these Panasonic halogen-superbright radiation toaster ovens.

A former cooking professional in the restaurant industry I love convection cooking.

A former cooking professional in the restaurant industry I love convection cooking.

“Night Witches” is the English translation of Nachthexen, aWorld War II German nickname for the femalenmilitary aviators of the 588th Night Bomber Regiment of the Soviet Air Forces.

As compelled by law as determined by the American Dairy Council.

I’m Sarah Connor and I approve of this message.

F$&k, Skynet would be better than most of them.