Thank you for this article title! No, really. It has pushed toddler songs out of my head.

They're wearing red ball caps 

Of course I’ve seen all of the MTV stuff.

If this is real:

If this is real:

Or ‘I hate you so much right now’ after the hair dyeing incident.

So the killer business pairing here will be a company that has custom battery packs to match up with the vehicle that you are converting. 

Girls just wanna have fun! 

Alien invaders arrive, wreak havoc, then realize that we’ve made our planet so much of a shit hole that they are actually making it no worse. Eventually the alien bean counters call off the invasion and all forces leave unharmed.

Waterworld was somehow more believable than Avatar. 

I was really hoping to see Chamberlain’s mystic counterpart: the two halves share many characteristics. I’d expect that the mystic opposite of Chamberlain would be VERY good at giving a rousing speech that energizes and returns lost hope when the Garthim army begins to incur major losses on the Gelfling. 

Imagine if a pumice raft like this was to drift through the down wind path of a sandstorm followed by a downwind proximity to soot fallout from a major forest fire.

I intentionally set out to develop and enhance my “sea turtle”-esq sense of direction. But this was part of a greater goal of teaching myself (a boy) Jedi powers (let the other kids bash each other pretending lightsaber duels) and “women’s intuition”.

If you are determined to kill insects or spiders with fire use a small fine mist sprayer filled with >85% pure isopropyl alcohol. You can use 99% but it burns hotter than you actually need.

Don't underestimate the IceBorg or you will be assimilated. 

Easy. Post a few dozen of these around the flight line with tracking software to aim them:

Delete 

A good long distance identification trick is “the way that they are driving”; basically the “body language” of the vehicle on the road.

Vitally important to the topic at hand:

How about a “scoop swap”?