The McCaskey’s are so cheap they’ve received death threats from the waitstaff at Texas Roadhouse.

Buffalo police would have responded sooner to the incident, but were delayed as they understandably assumed they were arresting Patrick and not Evander.

Yeah, no. Holy shit no. Just...wow.

“Because we just signed a once-exciting retread young quarterback whose one year of NFL excellence was due to his utilization of a skillset not suitable to the NFL, which he no longer has because of injuries.”

+1 refusal to ruin a young man’s life while you just sit there in air conditioning

You know all of the Tuscon and Santa Fe owners?

Dude, calm down - you make it sound like we’ve had 3,000 shooting victims this year or something... that was last year, we’re only at 2,296 so far.

$1350...?

FCA’s recent corporate hire and his stupid website, FCA Infinity, were immediately blamed for the scandal...

“I never said it was real - not after all the YouTube views, and the publicity, and the mention of my amazing company - I never said a word until it seemed like this thing might turn against me...”

A couple things:

Harden was considered a prime suspect until police determined that no shots had been fired.

Oh no, you’re good - I was also being “/s”

Ronald Reagan was a shit president - why modern Republicans praise his accomplishments is baffling to me.

We got drunk on warm cans of Icehouse (which, I’m just now seeing the irony there) that we found in my buddy’s basement until one of us projectile vomited in the kitchen sink. We took a group picture that night, but fearing that I would get recognized and not wanting to get in trouble, I turned my back to the camera.…

The Wonderlic killed my father and raped my mother...

I just spent an embarrassingly long time staring at the map before I realized that it may not be present day Europe...

I know I say this every time, but wow, their home record is shit.

That Puck’s name...?

“A player must complete a basketball move before fouling.”