I dont do anything negligent that is guaranteed to kill me over time.

Unfortunately taxes and medical insurance are necessities for me.

“Is this a sequel? Am I going to be in it??”

A treadmill isnt going to do jack shit if youre still eating a cheesecake for breakfast.

Its also not there to encourage behaviors that are going to lead to these fat asses dying of heart disease leaving me to pay their medical bills.

...

Bullshit, this wasnt a chamber orchestra.

“...instead of creating a meaningful partnership...”

If she wants to work out she can use my face for a bicycle seat.

Straight up.

Well that was fuckin’ stupid.

Sorry, im sure you think you know men but theres nothing “boring” about fucking a string of early twenties underwear models. Not even remotely.

Wow, those people look really greasy.

Why is he a shallow, vapid, douchebag?

Nothing pisses off older women like the fact that men can get older and older and still fuck 19-20 year old models because they are rich and famous.

I give a fuck.

He wasnt necessarily a misogynist.

Its always so sad when kinda hot girls get shot.

I also generally hold animals in higher regard than people because most people are idiots or assholes or both but at least the Norwegians arent beheading homosexuals in the town square.

I wish I could wire up a switch that would deploy the passenger side airbag when pushed. Sometimes my friends jabber on about the dumbest shit.