Well potato salad definitely does not make me happy. 

They need to ban that shit. It is now found in all sources of drinking water and is even found in baby food. 

I work at an orchard and I get raw unpasteurized honey, I also grow peppers, so I am able to make my own hot honey. 

The rise of pathologizing also seams to have risen in correlation to the amount of Social Security Disability checks issued a month.

I have been known to walk around with a pocketful of bacon.

That would be “Gyoza Potsticker Crispy Wiiings".

They were picking fully completed bfast items like breakfast burritos and biscuits and gravy, yet no one picked an omelette?

You are a lying liar who tells lies. 

Starred for the Chilito

I don’t hate Subway per say, but they have edged out every unique and local sandwich shop in town. (Just to be replaced with a mediocre chain sandwich.)

Dude, this is the inter-web, just stop it with your stupid facts and “logic”.

Or you can just get creative with your B rating. 

My local winco sells bulk honey out of a wooden box with a tap on it. There is a sign that reads: "do not remove lid, bees may escape."

Wear your crown dammit. 

Click-o-meter

I lost a day of work during my highest paying week of the year, it was more than a minor inconvenience. 

Fun fact: Hot dogs served in women's prisons are sliced up before being served. 

Perhaps we should pickle them. 

Yes, even pudding. 

The best sandwich is cheap white bread, some cheap ass meat, a slice of processed cheese, mayo, yellow mustard all assembled with dirty camping hands.