I’m with you on the tomatoes - too slippery for comfortable burger eating.

Amount of toppings is generally a concern with major “pizza” chains, so you damn well better believe I do.

Why would you not show us the inside of each... sandwich? Four identical outsides is not helpful, actually looking at the filling quantity/distribution/identity would be.

you don’t need to resort to theft.

“After one customer at Adam Perry Lang’s steakhouse APL was apprehended for stashing a hand-forged steak knife in a baby carriage—and charged $950.01 for it—they returned the knife. And now they are regulars at APL and, Perry says, even friends. Isn’t that beautiful? Sometimes crime does pay.”

Ford vs Ferrari Pt.2(?)

My hometown would end up on article, on The Takeout, because of the Wienermobile...

Because I had my door window broken three times costing me a trip to the yard, $50, and my own labor, until I finally learned to leave it unlocked and empty (insurance in the trunk). I am actually happy on occasions when I get in to find my glove box emptied and my car undamaged!

This.

I live in a 1970's car chase movie, and since my keys are on the visor, if I locked the car, I’d never be able to get back in.

“If you have the urge to be a self-important asshole...”

A friend of ours is moving back to Europe and gave us some of their kitchen appliances since they won’t work on European voltage. One of them was an egg cooker just like this (there seems to be a bunch of brands). I was rather skeptical about it, but I tried it this weekend and was really surprised at how perfect the…

I think you meant a surfboard, not skateboard.

I know this is evil week and all, but teaching kids that it is ok to lie to their family about what they are consuming is a bit too evil for me.

His attorney also notes Engle had a 20-year career in law enforcement without any other misconduct allegations.

There’s one in everyone’s area code. It’s the non-emergency number for the police department.

And since it’s homeopathic, you won’t even need a liquor license to sell it. Genius!

I’ll buy in, but only if we name it Gupe to bait in all of Paltrow’s minions.

I’m going to take this to the extreme, and launch a line of pricey homeopathic whiskey. Who wants in? We can make millions selling water to shitheads.

/better