“Like 83 percent of the people at Gizmodo Media Group.”

Thank goodness this guy didn’t get the nomination.  I just read that old people are the ones believing and spreading fake news. 

I think that Bugs would have a much more elegant solution than just cutting a big hole. Something involving cross-dressing and wordplay. Wile E. would be the one to try to use a saw.

I have just been informed that NFL drug policy is to protect the players from “deadly PED’s” and then was told to google Lyle Alzado (I also got called a fuckboi). I’m old enough to have actually watched Lyle Alzado play so no google search needed. I would counter with “google search Mike Webster” or Kyle Turley or…

He’s getting picked on obviously.  On a side note, that the NFL has any kind of drug policy at all is stupid.  These guys are beating themselves to death for money; let them ingest anything they can to numb the pain. 

HamNo gets to complain either way, so it’s fine by him. 

The first thing I thought of upon seeing the headline.  Can we all just agree to not tell them for a couple days?

Not trying to hijack the thread and I’m sure you already know, but you’re not alone. Having a dad that was super charming in public and a monster in private is a mindfucker. You’re so isolated in a situation like that because nobody believes you.

I would have felt better about the future of our country if he had struggled through “Hippos Go Berserk” instead of the “Xenophobia Playbook”.

I’m enjoying seeing the ageism pour out from the writers as if they themselves are going to remain 29 forever. Knowing that no matter how rigid their purity tests become, shitty joints, heartburn from everything, and bushy ear hair await them all is really fun.

Beyond a quick personal inventory of what has you annoyed in that moment, I refuse to believe anyone at Splinter does any research before writing their latest screed.

Kevin Hart is a terrible crime scene investigator and Ellen is sloppy about labeling evidence. 

Oh you should have seen the giant nonsense response from them that I dismissed.

“Why didn’t the child forced into sex work make the clearest, most rational decision?”

Just paying for sex, no big deal. That it was with a child being forced into the job doesn’t really seem to matter to them.

If it doesn’t hurt the least among us, it’s not a GOP policy. 

Other than to derail everything and make everyone talk about your particular kinks, what was the point of your nonsense?  

I don't know how long you'll get to remain out of the greys, but this is delightful. 

Is it possible Hamilton is supposed to be putting out articles under the Onion's banner but keeps sending them to Splinter by mistake?

Sounds like it’s the perfect time for Kahlua.