Look out, Bay Area storm drains, there’s an NBA championship ring a-comin’

That’s 33,000 kegs! Of shitty beer, probably, and I’m still thinking in 1992 dollars.

Interviewer: Stig, I’ve been told Dinsdale Piranha nailed your head to the floor.

Call him Dristan Thompson because a side effect is drowsiness.

Is that his son or did science develop a Johnny Galecki/Wil Wheaton hybrid?

(1) let’s not act like “were it not for the rest of his bullshit team Lebron would have won,” he averaged -10 in the four losses

(looks at recent directing streak on imdb) No, it makes sense from a “I need money for my retirement” perspective.

[Imagining the recent Suns, Kings, Lakers, Nets, 76ers, Hawks, Magic et al. as Mr. Nudge]

(sees Kyrie Irving, Kevin Love, and everyone else on the Cavs in a team photograph disappear like the rest of Marty McFly’s family in Back to the Future) Incidentally, Lebron was -7 for the series, bolstered by his being +32 in Game 4.

The most important thing is that he had to come READY TO PLAY BASKETBALL. When the Thunder blew their own 3-1 lead to the selfsame Warriors last year, several times Durant came ready to play snooker, or worse came to play competitive e-game spectating sponsored by John Stamos Penis Cream in Game 7.

After a headline like that, why even have an article?

Has anyone interviewed her about the fraudulent conspiracy that is.. BLACK SANTA?!

Rape-hushing? Tax evasion? Apparent unchanging good looks? I get it, it was the Commemorative Statue of Dorian Gray all along.

I don’t know how typical I am, but for me it’s the home team or bust, and screw the rest of the league (e.g., I never watched a Jordan final because the Rockets never met them in the Finals). It’s perfect now: James Harden is a great regular season player and playoff crunch-time shrinker, so there’s literally no point…

At least Tyson didn’t have to fight 80 regular season fights and then do several tiers of best of 7 playoff fights before uppercutting some flabby side of beef into next week.

My impression of NBA commentators for the regular season and 90% of the post-season, and maybe the other 10% of the post-season if god help us the Wizards or Celtics get in.

The important thing is despite losing only one game in the playoffs it still took seven months to complete and the next Finals can already be penciled in, unless the Celtics somehow upset the Cavaliers, then it’s Golden State in 3 in the 2018 playoffs.

Think outside the box, I think it’s lack of affordable housing units being built.

Please let there be a one-word “Won’t” review out there somewhere

Well WHY NOT GIVE THEM ALL PARTICIPATION TROPHIES AND BE DONE WITH IT