I'll take "medium-good"!

I mentioned it elsewhere, but I had a small collection of Rocketeer merchandise - no 'action figures' per se, but I had a few small statues of him in mid-flight and a hollow vinyl figure that could only move his arms and legs, likely both from the Spencer's Gifts in my local mall.

So I was around 4 when this came out, and for some reason I was goddamn obsessed with it. I played the game, would sit and stare at the poster whenever I saw it, and I owned a ton of Rocketeer toys that I'd drag with me EVERYWHERE I went including an incident of me losing one during a trip to the arcade and crying…

I can't hear "decrepitude" without thinking of Blade Runner, which might still be sort of applicable in this analogy.

Yeah, you know what, I saw him in a few things and found him amusing enough, and then I was kind of shocked to learn the internet thinks he's just the worst. Of course, I also found out people older than me hate the Nintendo 64, so I've been surprised by the internet before.

Nothing about this is okay, and hiring a director who is arguably best known for 'car chase' movies means that Warner Bros. has seen a few screenshots of Akira, saw the motorcycles, and leapt to a number of incorrect conclusions.

Yes, but only if you don't mind me testing every old computer keyboard we find to see if it's mechanical or not.

Oh shit, there was a novelization?! I have a novelization collection and I've somehow never come across this one.

I…but…but…no, my jean shorts~!

What ISN'T Kid Rock's fault?

It's the most Spielberg-y out of any of them, and with good reason. It isn't perfect by any means, and it went off the rails basically immediately afterwards, but it's good enough.

…wait, really?

Yeah, but it was the BEST Offspring CD!

I have not seen White House Down, but admittedly I do have the desire buried deep within me.

Ugh, what ISN'T?

WHAT WHAT WHAT

Ohhhh yeah, the Dehumanizing Car Scene was in effect right from the get go in these, and the peeing did get a chuckle out of me but maybe doesn't need to be in Transformers.

Also, holy shit what a good idea that is

Can we make a separate list for parts that Mifune should have played in movies that already exist? We can start with Obi-Wan Kenobi and go from there.

WHAT WHAT