I’m so sorry for your loss.

I am completely stunned that she managed to make a situation wholly about you (and your bebe) into some acerbic enforcement of her timeline for your life. Seriously. I want to hug you and give you a onesie I randomly bought at Marshalls the other day and make you a watermelon slushie.

Yikes! I am so sorry! WTF, Ma?

I’m sorry for your loss. I imagine if that happens to me, I will disembowel the first few question askers.

It really is one of those things that requires very few opinions and yet it feels as though everyone is compelled to share whatever comes to mind.

I try to remember it is more about the question asker being curious and less about any judgement on my situation, but it is such a rude question! Whether the person being asked is actively trying or not trying to get pregnant, it is very intrusive.

I haven’t been waiting on purpose. It just hasn’t happened yet.

I mean... aren’t we all wired to be animals? there is a reason why potty training a toddler is difficult, but no one is ever like, “no, let this 30 year old man shit on the floor like a fucking pigeon”

sing it!

Don’t get me wrong, I love the name “Pizza Hell” but I was raised to call it Pizza BUTT. See also: Jack in the Crack, Waterburger (which, actually, I love Whataburger, so I don’t know where that came from; also, in HS we called it “slutaburger”), Taco Hell.

Well they need the proof because men can’t trust anything a woman says without independent verification. Duh.

Nah, man, I pee into a disposable cup and dip.

100% the take away

Separate but equal... I see 0 issues that could arise.

Seriously, I just cannot get behind Rush. Something about his voice just kills it for me. I hate to reinforce the stereotype, but uggggh.

Uh, check your ‘tude, women have been taking things they believed to be abortificants for literally thousands of years. They’ve also been trying to use all kinds of things as prophylactic birth control.

hide that atheism under a bushel, yo.

That abortion is never addressed in the bible still totally blows my mind. How is it something we in the modern era debate around in circles endlessly but no one thought to include anything, one way or another, in the bible? WTF?

I mean, I know that your dismissal was for the best, but I’m super bummed because it genuinely made me laugh. Like, ALL babies have ESP? Did they mean something other than extra sensory perception and I’m just an ignorant ass? So many questions.

ESP BABIES SAVE ‘EM ALL