Always a boyfriend. And congratulations!

Didn’t Mark Ruffalo used to be Matt McGorry? or something?

I can relate! Sometimes I wish *my* last name was Johnson just so I could snicker when I say it, and I don’t even have a funny first name.

I wouldn’t hurt or flame (haha does anyone still say that) a fly, set me free! Dear Mark ungreyed the old me on his last day and we all know the lost-burner sad tale. Pleasepleaseplease

My husband and I list our 5s on a regular basis! I think both of us usually have the same 2 or 3 in there somewhere (my #1 is always LL Cool J, which is not germane to the topic of this thread because NO SHAME). His always includes at least one weather lady!

Ohhhh I knew it looked familiar and you nailed it! I love Lynda Barry.

Viiiiiiiiiiiiv

I remember when I was about 8, watching my great aunt remove her wig and put it on a wig head and then wipe off her high drawn-on eyebrows before we settled onto her bed to watch Walking Tall on TV. She was a magical lady with a bear skin rug and a fully-furnished doll house and the removable beauty was part of her…

It sounds like she’s pretty far gone, but maybe more exposure to Seth MacFarlane would help her. “Mom, THIS piece of human garbage is Ted. THIS!!” It might be traumatic at first, like a kid finding out that a Muppet has a human hand up its butt, but it could prevent further pain.

I just know I screamed out loud with gleeful horror when I heard the ad tagline “What if your DAAAD........ was a ***CAT***??????” It made me think of the South Park parodies of Rob Schneider movies (“He’s a stapler!”)

For a second when I saw the Pitbull pic I was like daaaaaaaaamn Billy! I did used to love him (Billy) too. But as the kids say, I just can’t with him anymore.

They should just call it “Botched! Nature’s Mistakes”

Ohhhhhh how I love Mike Doyle. I could have leapt through the TV and murdered that little fuck that killed him on SVU!

I thought so too too!!

As a house cleaner by trade I LOVE everything all white. You can actually see where it’s clean as opposed to cloudy or blotchy or uneven patterns. And it doesn’t smear when you clean it like black (large appliances). If I ever morph into a different person and actually design a home for myself I will have so much…

It’s difficult to pick but as a housekeeper, Santa Cecilia might be my most hated granite to clean.

I could read about stuff like this all day I shit you not

Hey can I ask you - I met a man in his late 20s once who was shocked to find out that there are no muscles in boobs (aside from the pecs underneath that everyone has). Did you know this?

I’ve only seen him in Moneyball, which surprised me at how interesting I found it, and I thought he was good. He was pretty understated and maybe not so funny in that one, if I remember correctly. I didn’t know he was some kind of bad guy until just now. I wonder what he did?!

I sincerely hope you’re reading it currently, Tommy the Tweaker is in full effect