God, I’m glad you brought the FaceBook thing up. I don’t do business with them, because I consider them to be sinister, but how is them sponsoring CPAC to the tune of 120,000 samoleons not a really, really huge news story?

Oh, very nice! +1000 points for the addition to the canon!

Doublespeak is the new jargon.

I am going to check it out. Did you ever see him on the show with Eugene Levy and the puppets? It’s name escapes me right now....Greg the Bunny! I loved that show! I own a copy of the few episodes that were made.

From what I understand, you are right: it hasn’t.

It’s so odd. Putin is playing Cheeto Hitler. Cheeto Hitler is playing the Repugnicans — they think they are controlling him, when actually, he’s pulling their strings. The media think they are keeping up with Cheeto Hitler by reporting breathlessly on his every move, the Russians are laughing at us, and the whole…

I laughed so hard at this I peed a little! Everyone must see this!

No, you just need to concentrate, that’s all. Nobody died and left you in charge of being a Smartphone.

What’s happening? My guess is too much porn. Porn sex does not resemble actual sex in most ways. If you are watching a lot of it, and are not receiving actual instruction from real sources, such as a book, person, or video designed as a teaching tool, you are headed for trouble, I think.

Well, some, anyway.

Well, I often end the week politically dissatisfied. Why not get a little boost in the other departments?

Oh, no, no, no, no. I can climax from that all on its own. Leave it on the menu, please.

Oh, I assumed it was a joke.

(See above:)

WHAT IS THAT? WHAT IS THAT? WHY DO MEN DO THAT?

It’s so aggravating, isn’t it?

We all should have them!

That sounds fiendishly unpleasant.

Yikes! Can’t un-think now!

I feel the same way about the oral sex. Two out of three is way better!