Yeah I read this whole thing like, "ummmm who gives a shit??" And what does it matter? I wonder if this weird need to try and control what people think of you is normal (and I'm just too oblivious) or if it's grown out of social media where everyone is supposed to be their own PR team.

Every time someone refers to themselves as a brand, the ozone layer shrinks by 4.6 inches.

The only non-psycho way I can think of to get other people to judge you less harshly is to judge them less harshly.

Or, you know, you could do what I do and NOT GIVE A FUCK! Everyone wants to be perceived well. Sure. But, if your goal is to get people to see you as something great, smart, or worthy, then you are going to be disappointed a lot. Work on how YOU see you and forget the peanut gallery. Because no matter what you do,…

Isn’t another way to look at this like.... “Actually try being the person you think you are.” I get that it is way easier to take if you look at this like people are misunderstanding you, and you just need to be better at projecting things.

It sounds exhausting to try to stay “on message” about my “personal brand” all of the time. I am a normal human, not a Kardashian. I think I will take my chances.

Looks like I’m adding this to the living will. Along with a breakdancing Jesus.

#3 is an excellent idea for a revenue passenger. Keep a lil bag with critical medications and the like under the seat in front of you, and try to get them to gate check your main bag.

i like that this lady has an appropriately mournful look on her face

I really don’t understand this whole piece. I am 5”2 as well. I’m not shockingly strong or a powerlifter. Yet, I can lift my bag up into the overhead compartment just fine. No help needed. Lift with your knees. Idk...it’s not that hard.

I’m sure it is. Life is full of annoyances, including occasionally being faced with things that are too high. It’s not like the airlines put overhead compartments so high just to be dicks. If they dropped overhead bins down another foot, you couldn’t safely or quickly exit the row. Your choices are: using a…

Because this article would be too short if it just said “ask someone taller.” Seriously, I have a hard time believing that more than one person (you might hit one jerk who ignores you) would decline to help you with a bag, if nothing else because it makes the plane load faster and/or the people sitting in the aisle…

Loose is the most disturbing description of tartar sauce I have ever heard.

Way back when I ordered a chicken pot pie at KFC and when I got home it felt kind of light when I pulled it out of the bag. Sure enough it was crust only... no filling. Got in the car, took it back, and the guy at the counter just said “musta been Sean.” A new pot pie with filling was provided.

“We asked for urine samples. We got three feces samples, two saliva, and one severed hand.”

The people insisting “dipped” is at all self-explanatory and the rest of us are morons for not knowing this bizarro regionalism are making me want to set something on fire.

I can’t stop laughing at this.

That’s so amazing.

Dammit, I want McNuggets now. But there’s a lot of food in the fridge that A: needs to be eaten, and B: won’t shorten my life.

I do wonder how this happens sometimes. Like, do they just malfunction? Do little sparks start flying out of their brains and they throw random ingredients into a bag?

One time I ordered a 4-piece McNuggets and was given a 4-piece McNugget box filled to the brim with tartar sauce.

I used to play a game at my local Burger King called, “How will they mess up my order today?” I would order a #1 combo (Whopper, fries, soda), with only ketchup on the whopper.

They never got it right. Not once.

Highlights were the time I got two fries with no drink, two drinks with no fries, a chicken sandwich (do they…