Je t'aime! That's fabulous. My dog is multilingual as well...she understands complex commands in both English and French. People think she's responding to hand motions, but I'll put my hands behind my back to demonstrate. To be sure, she will also respond and obey to non-verbal communication consisting entirely of…

One of my roommate's dogs is a stupid rat terrier. That little asshole hates me and will randomly attack me. I've only been bitten once, but the most recent attack, he went for my throat. I fell off the bed I was sitting on, and the fucker had locked down on my braid and was dangling.

Does anyone else anthropomorphize their animals to an embarrassing degree? I have always given my dog a voice, and I'm sure it was nearly constant the two years my ex was overseas. I worked from home and almost never interacted with people face-to-face. I moved in with my now-roommate 4.5 years ago. She has two…

Bullshit. Get checked out by a new gyn.

Some asshole in Columbus had two ocelots. They escaped through the bathroom window...maybe six years ago? My roommate told me a story about how she went to visit some family, and one of them was just walking down the highway. From what she told me, they were never recovered, but once she got to where she was going,…

But the Italian legal system is even worse. Guilty until proven innocent and shit like newspaper articles are admissible? It's easy to make the evidence fit your case.

Bostonian hospitals is half the reason my parents want me to move back east. Public transport is the other reason.

Ooh, and I got the bloodwork done. I posted an update in today's social, but there's really no substance and consists of me whining. My roommate took me to have it done on her day off.

I thought diagnoses can happen at age three. But if he qualifies, the school district (if you're in the US) is obligated to provide service to him.

What's that? You want to hear an update on my fucking health? Sure!

I say "I know, right?" when I want to channel some bitchy Regina George into a conversation. I don't think I've ever said it seriously.

Thank you! It's a HUGE weight off, for sure. My company used to be pretty small and was privately owned, and it wasn't difficult to have them work with me when I had health problems. Two years ago, they sold out to a corporation, and trying to get anything done was a matter of jumping through hoops, and generally…

As an update: transportation is still not sorted. I need bloodwork, but then I don't have another appointment until next month with my cardiologist. Cardio is close, and can probably just take a cab if I can't get a ride. My insurance doesn't have any transportation coverage, which I finally learned today. My…

Oh my, your grandma had some serious lady balls. Moose scare the fuck out of me!

Oh, I will. Whenever I'm stuck wearing medical equipment, a whore's bath is all I can take, and then flip my head over for some funky spigot shampoo.

Nice!

Ugh, none of that occurred to me until I read your post.

It's clear to me what you must do.

Maybe that the intent of strangulation is to kill? I pulled that out of my ass, so I don't know!

Holy shit, I just cringed so hard, I almost threw up. I knew I had that reaction for teeth accidents, and also eye accidents. This must be because of proximity to teeth? No. It's that this is FUCKING CRAZY OMG WHY.