I literally think of it every time I look at one of the 4 lava lamps in my office parent's basement.

Mapquest tells me that San Francisco is approximately 2064 miles from the Arch, but the actual distance may as well be calculated in light years. A quick Netscape search tells me that one of these cities seems to have more breweries than denizens, while the other only needs one, the grandaddy of them all. One city is…

Using the phrase, "low perceived probability of me making coitus," is unlikely to help change this perception. Just a thought.

Also coinciding with declines in home runs and highest strikeout rates in history:

NBA: This is too sexy

+1

Geno is PST; Blows Off Team Meeting

+1

+1

40 yr old white guy in khakis: "Yeah, wow, this place is really out there, huh? I thought these were only in Apple Stores."

I imagine that the ultra-conservative MLB thinking would hold that they wouldn't do this for fear of injury to players just getting back into shape during spring training or fear of wearing the players down so early in the season. Yes, I am saying this knowing full well that the subjects being described here are world…

Royals: [sign Doug Fister]

[scans Facebook for "people you might know"]

[watches Charlie Furbush]

+1

Thanks, Jolie. Now can you please provide the proper instructions for cleaning them? Spare no detail. Type slowly. Videos and images acceptable.

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[simultaneously wish they could press rewind]

Connor Barwin has weighed in on this critical topic already. What say you? (*)