No no Jessica! You don't have a muffin top! You are so thin and pretty and we all wish we could be just like you.

I dated a guy who got to video him one weekend in Chicago at height of JTT's Tool Time fame. JTT was polite to everyone, requested Chicago-style pizza for most meals, and jumped up and down with joy when he got to go out on Soldier's Field for a practice. My bf was shocked that he was so polite, and that his parents…

Way, way before I knew anything about Orson Scott Cards personal opinions (crap), I read all of his books and was convinced he secretly wanted to touch all the young men. His books have some serious man/boy creepiness about them.

wow so shibe wow

I can watch this shit all day, but they did an episode theorizing why dragons appear in nearly every ancient culture. So...you know.

I can't believe how narrow minded some people are. If I told you that there used to be people with naturally bright blue skin, you would probably call me a complete retard unless you had already come across this:

"Thus we see the life and death struggle between the big horn sheep and the pantomime Princess Margaret motocross rider".

Given the worldwide distribution of fossils, I'm willing to bet that skeletons belonging to beasties like this:

Plus, don't forget about the Lizard People!!!

Science is hard!

WARNING: Fourth one will not work on hipsters.

I am the worst kind of cat lady: a catless one. Ergo, every cat is my cat.

Keep one pit unwaxed and the other bare. Use the bare arm when you need to raise something more than 90 degrees. When you see a creeper staring at you, raise your unwaxed arm to wave at him.

awwwww yeaaaaaaa

Tell him you've been in a psych ward 12 times, especially on the first date. I love being able to use this one since it's true. It is definite dick repellant.

Along with the "Ican'tgetpregnant", maybe try revealing life crises or deep emotional insecurity?

In order to efficiently separate traditional from progressive men on the first date, I have said all of the following (just a small sample):

I pretty much have the same problem with the books, which is a lot of GRRM being all "BREASTS!!!!!! SEX!!!!!" to the point of excess. Though, it's decidedly more uncomfortable since half of the women are under 16.

I just typed this but I want to share it with you, too:

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