Heh.

Receptionist: "Doctor, Mr. Welker is asking if the procedure will be painful. Should I tell him to be worried?"

Ha!

Gay chicken, gay egg.

In an effort to lighten the mood around the stadium, officials have also decided to re-cast the four football player statues as War, Famine, Pestilence, and Death.

totes amazeballs

Nicely done.

Ah, this clears up a lot of confusion. I thought my foursquare friends were talking about some statue in Egypt. You know... the King of da Nile.

I had a feeling he'd cavre out a nice little niche for himself.

Ha!

Baseball purists will die before it happens there.

Ha!

"To be honest, I'm a little relieved. It takes me a good three or four bags to tape together a mask anyway."

[Sits down.]

That's good.

Heh.

In fairness, a lot of those viewers simply landed on the wrong channel after tuning in to catch a look at Denver's standout Cuban rookie, Primero Sangre.

I call shenanigans. You can tell from the single set of footprints that his coach was carrying him.

This made me laugh.

Needless to say, Jerry Sandusky was extremely excited when he heard there was an Ursa Minor in the area.