Would Lion-O Still Go No. 1 In The Draft If He Liked Snarf Porn?

Peter King has the tick-tock of Manning's brief

Even quirkier was the provision calling for a payout of 30 pieces of silver to J. Elwariot.

"So he's not gonna need those vertebrae anymore, right?"

"I guess you can't actually lead a horse to water."

Ha!

The women from Saudi Arabia look to be the favorites for the inaugural gold medal in Jazz Hands.

Tebow Schaudenfreude

That reminds me of the time Bill Clinton ate two tarts before a rugby match. Hillary didn't let him hear the end of it for weeks.

But are all the fish safe?

Having duly considered the facts at hand, we are of the view that this ship is, by all demonstrable measures, sinking.

The Bucks must have promised him he could ride his scooter all the way to Milwaukee.

Mo Vaughn is all well and good, but I'm more excited to see the charity's cheerleaders, the Knish City Dancers.

Meanwhile, two CERN scientists are snickering because they convinced Jeff MacGregor that the Redskins are trading up to draft a previously unseen player named Higgs Boson.

As my pastor used to say: Pennants is the price of Lin.

Power? Balls.

It's been clear for some time that the Mets need to bring in an expert on sobermetrics.

No word on Peyton's decision, but Chad Lowe has the inside scoop on where Eli is going to cash in his gift card from the Coinstar machine at the mall.

Damn, I got there too late! All they had left was linseed.

Hey, let's not be too hard on them. Even people who make terrible mistakes deserve to be recognized for the positive things they've accomplished. Like royally screwing Scottie Pippen.