Hm. Looks like Emmanuel won't be getting scored on as often as the movie would lead you to believe.

It should be noted, however, that "shaking the biscuit" is an excellent way to distract a free-throw shooting Glen Davis.

Can you also track down BadDonor? I've gotten two bum kidneys and a leaky heart from that guy.

"Ugh. This is not what I had in mind when I did an image search for 'Peyton Manning Balls Deep'."

"What can I tell you, man? You think it's easy keeping you knee-deep in top hats? And do you have any fucking clue how expensive bespoke cricket-sized spats are? You brought this on us... I'm just the one taking the fall. Asshole."

"You're with me, Lieber."

Shocked by the revelation that the brackets are built in China by child workers, labor activists began pushing for 100% organic American-made brackets instead. As of press time, Tom's of Maine was reported to be developing a prototype that works half as well as regular brackets and tastes like ass.

What happens in Vegas stays in OH GOD HE'S OFF HIS LEASH AND PUNCHING THINGS!

"Hey, it's harder than it looks to block Nets."

I guess I was wrong when I said LeBron couldn't carry Kobe's jockstrap.

Ouch. And just when it looked like Mr. Met was turning the corner in his struggle with hydrocephalus.

A good football cameraman knows to focus on all three phases of the game: offense, defense, and through-fence.

Pfft. It's like Waldo isn't even trying anymore.

- "That kind of edge and attitude is Natitude!"

In his defense, we know he has a hard time keeping his hands off a swollen joint.