I knew getting through a DS article without a pun would be a pipe dream.

Potato salad is the only way I’ll eat fragments of hard-boiled eggs. So yes.

Fuck, I’d forgotten about Bynum.

My wife thinks she’s “the good one”. Fuck that noise.

the power forward for the Kardashians

I’m borrowing that one.

Everyone was probably hatewatching the Zuckerberg hearing.

Ain’t nothin’ but a sammich

I live to serve.

LMFAO

You come at the orange, you best not miss.

Fuck Ray Lewis with a deer antler.

Gronk’s Pregnancy Scare

I didn’t know cookout invitations were a thing until I started reading The Root. Do you know how hard it is to uninvite a jackass to anything after they’ve cleared the gate, even once?

I’ve been told repeatedly that it is OK by black family members and still never use the word.

Gandalf. Hernandez.

I think he was washing those weird-ass socks in mercury.

At 28 tracks and over two hours playing time, The Smashing Pumpkins’ Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness might have had one or three low points/dry spots. This track was not one of them:

Sometimes you just know when you’ve been beaten.

He wants you to suffer the way he did.