I didn’t know you could do that from inside the kitchen.

Williams: Look, I’m just going to level with all of you here. The kid’s 14 years old and his hormones are raging, and we can’t afford to buy all new uniforms and merchandise calling ourselves the Chicago Crusty Socks.

Now THAT’S a wicked googly.

“Amphetamines? What do frogs have to do with this?”

- Emmitt Smith

When also unemployed Rob Ryan was asked about Mark Jackson, he simply responded with the opening bars of “Werewolves Of London” before pounding a sixer of Coors Lite.

Stars?? I deserve to be un-greyed for bringing this magical gif to the public’s attention.

This is all the proof you really need.

wait so this editorial board works near some of the richest people in the country in the OC so does this mean that they also can be paid $0.50/hour

She’s dead to me.

STOP BRAGGING IT’S NOT A GOOD LOOK

Find the fucking panda

This will almost certainly put him at odds with former teammate and notorious crip Wes Welker.

“Great, now we’re both suspended!”

An undefeated 13-1 season is perfectly respectable. No need to lie about the stats.

ODB is a big baby, jesus.

I thought he was the mastermind of a complex, detailed scheme to tamper with footballs that took $5,000,000 and five months to untangle.

I want to say Stockholm Syndrome, but Stockholm is at least a pleasant place to live.

I’m just kidding. I...I don’t have a job.