AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I used to play pretty seriously. The rules are simple. The main goal is to achieve “The Queen’s Errand,” or have the most netted balls by the end of the crow’s watch. If the pepper is placed in your path, you have to wheel the cranberry using only the poetic side of your bike. The lines on the court indicate the…

“Let’s not go overboard.” — Fred Smoot, October 6, 2005

“Um, we sent the Vikings to Mars forty years ago.”
-NASA

Seems legit, Burress isn’t known for shooting his mouth off.

Mehh, not as bad as Kam Chancellor and his failed Fonzie scheme.

That might be the single most 2015 White Sox play of the 2015 White Sox season. #WhenDearGodWillItEnd

SOURCE: Tony LaRussa is driving around St. Louis, texting his family for his own address.

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Pictured: 2016-17 San Antonio Spurs

Counterpoint

Kenny Williams will never, EVER do that. He is stuck in his ways and will continue to:

Home Plate Ump: Fight me, Lester!

Nice work, Mr. Woolley.

Wow, these FIFA bribes are getting really out of hand.

24 hours to come up with that? Man, this guy really puts the slow in “Winslow should have been quicker with his comeback considering the fact that he doesn’t have a job in the NFL anymore due to his questionable behavior and squandering of his enormous potential during a career slowed by injury.”

The child in the back makes this even more heartbreaking.

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These Are The Letters You Get When You Own An NFL Team