I don’t hate Quentin Tarantino and I also don’t think he’s a genius.

That’s obnoxious, derivative, offensive without being witty, and probably just a rehash of something someone with more talent had said more eloquently.

Does it have something to do with the fact that this is a subjective question of qualitative evaluation and will necessarily generate radically different responses? Or it could be that some of us aren’t blessed with your godlike intellect and are unable to appreciate a genius?

On to Denver? As in the airport hub of all conspiracies? SHAKE UP, WEEBLES!

If you go camping with them, don’t leave a giant bag of popcorn just out on the table, and if you do don’t be surprised to find it spread all over the campsite. Speaking from experience.

They prefer to be called “Durin’s Kin”

Love is love, my friend. Love is love.

This sounds kind of like my family, except that they have comically large testicles and use leaves to change form in order to play silly jokes on us.

If Carly had seen the video of men in aprons standing around the carcass of a Turkey and harvesting its organs to be made into gravy....

Victorians preferred vibrators for the treatment of hysteria. At the same time as they warned boys that masturbation would destroy mind and body.

I bet she didn’t put any thought into the stationery.

They have the technology. It goes way deeper than you think.

So, “Steve” is Jason Garrett, right?

And added a song to it?

No, we had to cancel that, too because it uses Latin letters.

A lot of people seem to think it’s not gay unless you’re receiving.

I absolutely lust after Crown Royal Black. However, I was drinking it heavily while watching My Beloved Texas Rangers in Game 6 of the 2011 World Series from a bar in Hot Springs, AK. Because of this, Crown Royal Black is smooth, rich, and spicy with notes of oak, vanilla, and bitter baseball tears.

I always avoided reading Behind Closed Ovens because I just don’t want to relive my experiences.

If only there were a blog for all those stories. If they had a blog like that and cancelled it... man, that’d be dumb.

Yea, I’d have to say that the Christmas Rape Song is the worse offender, but DTKIC is just so, so bad. Almost every word of that song is so stupid that it makes my brain hurt.