I have a friend who sells surgical equipment, so often he’s required to be in the operating room with doctors, and I’ve seen him several times at the grocery store at the end of the day in full scrubs, and I think he should be required to tell people he’s not a doctor every time he wears that shit out in public,…

I think Pierson might actually enjoy her upcoming tenure as Wife #4.

As someone who reads his column every Monday, I definitely could have gone without knowing what his nasal voice sounds like.

Sad!

That video would be so much better without the idiot laughing like an idiot for THE DURATION OF THE VIDEO.

Sarah, this is a beautifully written, important piece of writing. Well done.

I went to grad school at Auburn (insert jokes here), and people there are very big on referencing “The Auburn Family.” It made me feel very nervous and uncomfortable. I have enough problems being a part of the family I’m already in.

The answer to the question posed in the headline is yes.

If only there had a been a good duffel bag with a gun nearby, this could have possibly been stopped.

I often wonder how many millions of collective hours have been completely wasted by prayer.

Ugh. I read this whole thing, and regret it so much now.

I can’t decide whether I dislike Johnny or the paparazzi more. Life is full of tough decisions.

Earliest Funbag ever?

“The first person who appears to have tweeted the image is the anime-avatared gentleman above, but the hashtag #ManEnough4Hillary has been circulating for a few weeks, mainly from aggrieved gents who seem to believe that my labia wrap themselves around the voting lever every four years.”

Hahahahahahaha

You could always just stop reading Gawker.

Where's the funbag? I had to eat Tuesday lunch scrolling through Facebook. That's wack.

That tenth guy is shit outta luck.

I really like how they do the Super Mario coin sound when a run scores. If they would incorporate more of these little touches, I’d be more inclined to watch baseball.

That’s a lot of white people.