The black album was always in my CD player as a teenager for the simple fact that the first 8 seconds of Nothing Else Matters, played on all open strings, is nature’s guitar tuner.

So we saw Phantom Thread this weekend and I picked up on the Welsh Rabbit thing, and I’m like, what the hell is that? I’m a big breakfast guy. What is this magical foodstuff that this wealthy and refined man of exacting taste orders from the young ingenue? I’m obsessed with it the whole movie.

I’m convinced that a clean shave and a tucked-in shirt makes you like 80% less likely to be hassled by TSA.

Because nobody else wants them.

Will be? Already is, my friend!

Archie Bunker is the unironic hero to misogynists of a certain age. I’ve witnessed it first hand time and again. Let’s just say some the nuances have been lost.

You can trace a similar line from All In The Family, Married With Children, Home Improvement (arguable), and The Man Show on Comedy Central to the emergence of Spike TV. All part of a venn diagram with varying degrees of overlap with the things you mention.

God, in my life of pop-culture disappointments, that was the absolute rock bottom.

This has been “Pudding’s Poetry for Men”

We had a good run, bros.

More than half of Paneras are franchises. Fast food companies are really in the IP licensing business - they give some local company the right to use the name and indicia and other accouterments in exchange for a hefty licensing fee. And the companies can really put the screws to their franchises like Joe Pesci in…

Huh. Neat.

And don’t get me started on his crimes against fashion.

I hope you kept a low profile, protestants like Lutherans are NOT allowed to take Catholic communion. I learned that the hard way!

It’s a thin, dry, brittle, styrofoam-y cracker. They’re so tasteless, they almost have negative-taste. When it hits your tongue, it basically melts and it feels like it sucks the moisture out of your mouth. Eating one for the first time is a mildly unusual experience.

Ok, your majesty, pray tell us humble mortals what passes muster with your ever so discerning sense of humor.

The gag in Beerfest where one of the guys dies, and then in the next scene you’re introduced to his identical Texan cousin, who wants to memorialize his dead cousin by acting just like him and going by his name, is one of my all time favorites.

I have endless goodwill towards Artie Lange because of how much I loved Dirty Work.

I have always considered myself a big Tina Fey fan, I read Bossypants and everything.

In France, a wizard is called a “royale with cheese”