Plus IKEA can turn the slower ones in to meatballs.

According to Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull, in the event of a nuclear explosion.

Funny how dead people mess up those life expectancy stats, that was a deep insight there Ben.

I wonder if he went through a rebellious teenaged phase and became an awesome human between like 14 and 22. 

Look, we can all agree that JFJ is a hypocrite of the highest order and one of the most reprehensible scumbags going. There is absolutely no debating this.

Here’s what we do: 1st, give all the homeless rakes. 2nd, relocate them to forests throughout Cali. 3rd, pay them minimum wage to to help prevent forest fires. 2 birds 1 stone. I’m awesome. You’re all welcome.

Beto: Fucking immigration man!!!! Like, Trump sucks bro!

what can I say: your anger at a child for trying to address the problems is really, really funny to me

This Craig isn’t even trying anymore. The old tomato didn’t play his trolling hand so early in the post. His posts are boring. 

Is it ironic that the statue representing the stock market appears strong and impenetrable until someone comes along and gives it a good beating, showing it to be ultimately hollow?

Yes, congratulating himself, of course.

Uh....because the NOAA is one of the agencies tasked with making this country more prepared for future hurricanes. And they have just demonstrated that they will lie about hurricane science to keep the president from being embarrassed.

The Head Rat does love the smell of urine...

Add this to the list. 

But I’ll take it...I’ve never stopped about praising Warren. She deserves every bit she gets.

To the distinguished lady from Massachusetts: whoop that ass.

I want to address something here:

Couldn’t find a good guy with a gun in Midland-Odessa?

something funny about an actual Nazi also being a grammar nazi