You are in my head. The creepy face is strong in this one.

Holy Penguins! My level of jealousy is off the charts. Good thing I am going to my local zoo (which is the freaking BOMB - Omaha Henry Doorly - the shizz) to honor my penguin gods later this week.

She was trying too hard back then, and even more now.

1. Elizabeth Taylor - Vision, always. No matter what event or occasion she was always on point.

Alert: All day marathon of “Mommy Dearest” on IFC on Sunday!!

Cracklin Oat Bran exhausts me. So much chewing, But half and half on any cereal? Totally support.

It seems to me there are no more “Super Models”, but “Victoria Secret Models” or “Sports Illustrated Models” - everyone has a specific model label. It was a different time and I do miss it.

Is Dame Dash the same person as Damon Dash? And if not, which one has the over priced store in Miami that the Kardashian’s show up in on occasion?

Hovering dangerously close to a Canadian Tuxedo.

I get the vibe with Chrissy/John and Kim/Kanye that it’s always a record label setup and C/J can’t really stand them, but put up for the pub and business side. I just don’t see Chrissy being friends with Kim. Totally different priorities.

Done. Still feel shitty, and am now hungry.

I saw this Aretha thing live. I totally gasped and said to myself “Oh, honey”. I feel ashamed to have said that in response to the Queen, but...

And now sobbing.

Sobbing now. A little part of my 15 year old self and the glory that was the summer of 1984 is now dead. RIP

My heart is literally palpating right now. Hyperventilation soon to follow.

This drink exists in my house only when I run out of Bacardi and I am too drunk to go to the store. I always have a bottle of Absolut in the freezer in case of Sunday morning screwdriver emergency.

Jesus, thank you for the detailed explanation. I was totally confused (perhaps it was the rum).

OK all you young Jezzie’s - the old is checking in. Go to Vegas. Go to Cabo. Go where ever and skip this whole charade. Fuck the ceremony, dress, cake, mom’s dress, mom in law’s dress, photos, all of it. Go to city hall then to your local watering hole with your peeps. Your great aunt twice removed doesn’t give a…

As a dedicated grandchild I pay for my grandmothers subscription. Totally worth it to see the joy in her face and her pass around the issues to all of my auntie’s. My first memory of her is reading the enquirer in her old house. Now it is my privilege to make sure she gets her fix in the retirement village.

I took it as “The republicans are a shit show and can’t win, so I’m good with Bernie or Hillary - either way it’s a win for my side”. Maybe it’s because I’m high, but I love her and am willing to give her the benefit of the doubt.