Standing in the shadows after a disheartening first-round exit is fellow countryman Mesh Shortz-Minkievic.

To be fair, he might just be promoting Roy Halladay in general. I also assume his name is a reference to an unrelated inside joke.

I have a feeling this couple is gonna make it.

I scream at other people's kids all the time. At least until someone roughly my dad's age breaks it up.

This is the part where we find out inmate is actually an inmate and would thus be forbidden to view who recommended who anyway.

I'm just relieved to see I didn't imagine Manuel Barrios after all.

I'm glad they shortened it to the Talons. Trying to cheer for the San Antonio Humanfingernailontheendofapenis'es was a lot of work.

This will still probably be more successful than management's highly-criticized "Bring Your Slave To Work Day"

It would also be cool if they stayed in Charlotte but stopped being fucking terrible. This town can support an NBA team, but it is simply not fun to watch these assclowns play basketball.

I get up, I drink coffee, I read the paper, I have breakfast, I go out on my bike and train. I come home, I have lunch with the kids, then I spend the rest of the day in meetings, playing golf or in the park with the kids. And about 5 p.m., I open a nice cold beer and I think.

Tragically, several gnats were charred to a crisp by the merciless flames.

That's actually their reaction to the blatant pedophile telling them baseball games are nine innings long.

Honestly I like that better than those "Just do whatever you think is best, man." Karl Malone billboards.

A forever home was never found for Davey Boy Smith. So he died.

Like Durant, Wall has strategically put tattoos on parts of his body that might not be visible when he’s in uniform.

Claude Julien wasn't just dissembling when he said Bergeron had a "body injury."

It still scores you more hot babes than saying you're Craig Sager's dad.

I'm sure letters will be pouring in about Nadal's public buttfucking.

The victim was determined to be 50-something-years-old after medics counted the number of rings on his face.

As the celebration continued, the procession moved past a babbling brook from which Riley refused to drink.