A sense of entitlement.

why.

Republican in the front, skinhead in the back.

Anecdotal data incoming: Some of them do ok:

LOL!! Give me ALL the sodium!!!

You’re one of them now.

(I wanna put an Emo Kylo Ren gif here but Kinja and I are fighting.)

To be fair, that’s really only like ... 12 pairs of their tights.

Nope - I have zero shame. I do it at my desk at work. I could careless who is judging. I want the crumbs!!

Was fully prepared to hate. Still hate her taking over the intercom to force unenthused chanting like every camp counselor ever but who among us hasn’t dreamed of doing the Bridesmaid bit on a plane?

Yogurt again, somehow.

Both Snackwells and raisins taste like failed dreams and sadness.

I am sure you have tried this... but I shake them into one corner, but don’t stuff them into that corner... kind of loose shake.

I don’t know why your comment reminds me of this but it does:

JLaw is a national treasure, and I promise to visit her regularly in the federal penitentiary.

I love how unenthused everyone is. It’s not even a flight to or from 500 miles of Philadelphia!

Your wife sounds like a monster.

First it was the Bic pen for women. Now it’s snack foods. What’s next in useless innovations? Scissors for women? Banking for women? Cell phones for women?

I was literally polishing off a small bag of Cool Ranch doritos as I read this and had reached the “tipping the bag into mouth for crumbs” section right at that goddamn paragraph.

“The less decisive and the less present the woman, the easier it is to score.”