...short-rib burger blend molded into a sad little meat thing, sitting in the center of a massive, rapidly staling brioche bun, hiding its shame under a slice of melted orange cheese...

since he cant sell burgers at his restaurant and can’t sell his steaks at sharper image, he has to take his beef to twitter.

Legitimately once got drunk pizza from 7/11 (it was terrible) and tried to give some to a homeless man...and he refused.

And what a fucking germ farm that monkey was. All I’m saying is, Patrick Dempsey shoulda worn a rubber...

Remember when The Learning Channel didn’t make you feel dumber just flipping past it?

Well it’s not so much a cake as this little round pastry thing. Actually think of this, I once had some chicken wings from a 711 and a hot dog from the little metal spinners. You know what? It actually wasn’t that bad but I did feel fairly ill after I ate it.

Im imagining the weapons grade UTIs she has endured.

You know how I know that I’m trying to loose weight?

Remember when Bravo showed opera and ballet and jazz concerts and Shakespeare?

I am so ready & prepared for this shit show!

The cycle of history repeating itself speeds up.

I’ve done it before, I’ll do it again: his cover of The Little Mermaid song is just too good.

I think he was performing at the Super Bowl one year and my super cynical father took a moment from bashing whatever it was he was bashing and stared at the screen in silence for the the remainder of his performance. When Bruno was done, all my dad said was, “wow, that guy is talented”.

Bruno Mars is probably the finest male performer of our generation. COME AT ME.

Russia and China blocked every attempt by the UN to intervene. Obama is still dealing with Bush’s two ongoing wars in the region. Russia is all in. Putin will kill everything that breathes in Syria to maintain the Russian naval base in Tartus, its only base on the Mediterranean. Do tell us what Obama should do.

Obama hasn’t given Putin a pass on things so we pretty much know where he stands on Russia. Trump, not so much.

Donald probably sent Putin an Edible Arrangement, with a card reading: Great Job! You’re a Winner! See You in January at My Inauguration!

Where am I blaming him? I said ask him about Putin’s involvement in this. He’s going to be in charge so why not? He seems reluctant to blame Putin for anything.

“Are you truly incapable of shame? Is there literally nothing that can shame you? Is there no act of barbarism against civilians, no execution of a child that gets under your skin?”

I used to play D&D with a guy who kept a Nazi flag up on his wall as a display. He always shrugged it off as just part of a ‘historical’ interest... but I always got the feeling that there was something deeper going on, and that was decades ago.