it ceases to be

No lie, growing up my folks only ever bought miracle whip, and used the word “mayo” when referring to it.

Nope that out the door and get yourself fresh mayo (or make some)

Kraft singles or Velveeta..... then you can possibly make a case.

smoked gouda, gruyere

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that not all Ford’s are assholes.

I’ve suggested to men that they need to press an 8lbs ham out of their asses*

She’s trying real hard to sound badass and coming off as a dickhead, not realizing that even guys that talk like that sound like dickheads too.

Which is exactly the part that makes me laughcry in a way. We live in this every year, we know this is what happens and we know we have to alter our driving habits to deal with it.

behind a guy going too fast coming up to a sharp corner

The WWI reference right off the bat is apt.

I want to say that about Toronto.

Well to be fair just about everyone in Canada magically forgets how to drive in the first snowfall.

Sorry syrup, this is how I prefer you served.

if they aren’t trying to pretend to be maple syrup

THIS!

Get thee north immediately. If in Canada, well go anywhere.

but the protection comes at the cost of their entrepreneurial spirit and adds a somewhat unwieldy system to the mix

When Vancouver lost game 7 of the Cup final to Boston.