Remember... Only the Conception was Immaculate.

This administration is run by people who thought that the real lesson of the Holocaust was, "Don't keep meticulous records." 

The Starbucks Christmas cups are still not sufficiently Christmas-y.

Now that we've concentrated them in camps, I'm sure that the administration will come up with a final solution to the migrant problem. 

Whether or not her driving was reckless depends solely on whether she was driving in excess of 20 mph of the posted speed limit.

I have no problem with enforcing the law.

You do realize that there is a song called "I Just Can't Wait To Be King," which, based on how Pride Rock succession works, should be called "I Just Can't Wait For My Dad To Die." 

Well, if there's anyone who can fuck it up, it's the man who bankrupted a casino - a business where idiots get drunk on cheap booze and then voluntarily give you all of their money. 

If they had a lick of sense, those fucking Republicans wouldn't be in office in the first place. 

I'm going to vote for the rich bastard with a long documented history of stiffing contractors. He's looking out for the little guy! 

In related news, GM is laying off 15% of its salaried workers amid slumping sales. As it turns out, sales in China are down due to Trump’s idiotic trade war and overall sales have dipped because of increased prices necessary to cover the increased cost of steel thanks to Trump’s steel tariffs (tariffs have a ripple…

In an ice cream sandwich, they are a bread analog. 

We’re at the in-laws for Thanksgiving weekend. My 9 week-old daughter met her 15 week-old cousin for the first time.

An ice cream sandwich is a sandwich.

As you can see, her argument fails to disprove the definition of a sandwich as “food bounded by bread or a bread analog.”

Because it’s not the same thing.

I think that you forgot about the "Silent Night, Deadly Night" series, "Eyes Wide Shut" and my personal favorite Yuletide classic, "John Carpenter's The Thing." 

Because cheesecake is a pie, it is indisputable that pie is greater than cake. 

When dealing with the stress of people with whom you share genetic material and not much else in close quarters with naught but football and dry poultry whose lack of seasoning is papered over with butter (*blech*), you need to use a pincer movement to really be able to destress.

You misspelled "Donal Logue."