I live in a state with tons of craft beer breweries and legalized medical marijuana. So... that's how I deal.

They do live shows all over the world these days. But every time I’ve seen them, it’s been in Detroit.

Love Welcome To Night Vale! Saw them live 3 times

Can I just pretend it was Jack Handey?

LOLOLOL I’m stealing this for my Facebook

These are the same dipshits who think windmills slow down the wind (which makes the planet hotter doncha know) and that solar panels suck up all the sun.

#Wow #Inspiring

And she wonders why I still don’t have kids, or don’t talk about my future or relationships with her, or, between the Pull Out talk and that time she came over, drank 3 craft beers, and drunkenly told my 2 guy room mates that they needed to find a nice man to take care of me, why I refuse to be around her when she's…

Generally those people tend to be your super rednecks who need more shit blown up than fireworks can offer, or your standard young male Libertarian with a copy of the Anarchist's Cookbook on his hard drive.

I’m fitting to slap the next person who sees condoms on my nightstand and assumes we gave up on No Babies, or who sees my tampon box or me with a tampon in my hand en route to the bathroom and asks “WHY AREN’T YOU USING A MENSTRUAL CUP?! HAVE YOU NOT HEARD ABOUT THE JOYS OF BLOOD CLOT CUPS, HEATHEN?!”

I know for me, being the oldest of 3 Welp! babies made me very open to the idea of abortion at a young age.

I’m pretty sick of the reckless label. I spent years going through every brand of hormonal BC trying to find one that didn’t make me go up 2 cup sizes, make me violently angry constantly, give me migraines, or send my blood pressure through the roof.

My brother is a diaphragm baby my husband has a big dick, and I’m allergic to spermicide (also not willing to test every spermicide on the market cuz Ouch)

When I had to have my IUD removed (complications), and then had to go off the hormonal birth control I started using afterwards (unbearable side effects), my husband was all “Okay, I’ll just pull out”.

Ditto. Looks like Mr. Farticus will not only be donning the non-latex condom, but he's pulling out too.

Maybe Canada.

According to a friend who spent a couple years in Mongolia, horse is somewhere between beef and venison when it comes to flavor and texture.

Only one more year of this bullshit. Gird your livers.

Looks like you need this